Thursday, December 10, 2009

"You fail at parenting"

The Internet is full of good people. It's true. Do you need advice on any subject? Do you need a donation to your favorite cause? Do you simply need virtual companionship? You can find all that and more. I don't know what it is about the anonymity of the internet that allows people to show their best sides. But people who spend their days avoiding other people will dive head-first into the Internet with a ready kind word and a virtual hug.

That same anonymity, however, allows us to be the worst we can be.

A 5-year-old kid asked his father to help him write a "Stay Out Daddy" sign on his door. The father wrote these words for his son to copy:

You fail at parenting

The son copied his father's sign. The End.

But what could be just a short funny parenting story, turns out to be a story about Internet comments.

Sure, while I think this is funny and harmless, some of you consider any type of lying to a child wrong. Santa and the Tooth-Fairy aren't real, the dog has been cremated, and a son's wish to keep his dad away from his room is sacred.

But would any of you, in real life, say anything like the Anonymous comments below?

(It seems like some of the really offensive personal stuff has been deleted, but between all the "Leave him alone. It's just a joke" comments, there are still a few gems left.)

Someday you'll show him this post and laugh. You'll laugh, but your son will then remember why he always used to think you were a retarded dick- because you were. How low can you go, you sick fuck.

I don't know if you are small and manipulative, but you sure come off that way in this.

Your son is 5 years old and couldn't write "stay out daddy" on his own? Not only do I feel bad for your child as it is obvious that he is lacking in educational development, but that his inane father doesn't help the situation any.

You fail at parenting, you fail at life and way to make your kid look like the jackass you are. Please, go have your genitals removed promptly.

wow thats gotta trick your son into loving you..thats horrible

It's not about whether or the kid can spell - it's pretty fuckin messed up that at 5 the kid cant read. Seriously - he doesn't know the dif between awesome and keep out? either he's retarded, or this whole thing is made up


  1. Wow...methinks Anonymous has some daddy issues, huh?

  2. No Santa? Agggggggggggggggg!!!!

    Liked the post.



  3. Holy cow - that's why I always use the same name on all of the sites that I visit whether the comment I leave is positive or negative. I don't believe in anonymity (for myself) on the web.

    -anonymous. (kidding!)

  4. Hey! I'm the dad in question. Those comments were AWESOME! Some people just don't get it.

    Funny you should post this because Greg (my son) just learned how to write and spell (kinda) on his own. Check this one out:

    Take care!

  5. Towards the end, I couldn't tell the difference between the people who were playing around and the people who were truly jerks. And it reminds me of the time Mike Adamick took photos of his daughter in midfall and people screamed at him, "Why didn't you catch her, you horrible father!!!!!"

    Also, my 5 year old cannot read and writes some letters backwards, both of which are normal according to his preschool teachers. Uneducated people give the worst advice.

  6. They just don't get it. It 99% wasn't about the kid being fooled, or dumb, or whatever.

  7. It is true that no matter what you do, you will find some self proclaimed expert. As a parent, you already know that most of the best parents in the world don't have kids. These are the people who make snide comments or say things like "if THAT kid were my kid" or the like.

    For example: My neice was born with a cleft lip and pallet. She will have surgeries to fix that problem until she is 21 years old. Just after the first surgery, which was done at a couple of months so she could eat, she had to wear "no nos" on her arms. Those are basically casts that keep her hands from being able to reach her face.

    My wife and I have been to every surgery and assisted in the recovery so we were there when the mother was waiting in line at the pharmacy. Some 'expert' behind us said "look at that.. that is just terrible for that little baby .. What kind of horrible mother would let her child break it's arms at that age".

    The mom broke down and we all turned around to set her straight.

    The moral of the story is that you NEVER know what things are like at home so keep your mouth shut.

    The man, the dad and the husband

  8. Daddy Geek Boy, I mean, I'm a LITTLE resentful of my father's jokes. Did he really have to tell me Debra Winger was his first cousin? He told me that when I was about ten, and I kept telling people with pride about my random Hollywood connection ten years after that before he told me he was joking. Maybe if I had internet connection when I was twenty I would have become Anonymous.

    Babbo, maybe that was a bad example. Of course there is a Santa. And he's watching you all the time.

    RobMonroe, I've lost the illusion of my ability to remain anonymous. Still, I believe I do lose something when I lose my anonymity, because I go back to relying on my lifetime-constructed self-identity rather than being this free self-invented Anonymous character.

    Doug, hey, WELCOME. Your son gets cooler every day. I didn't mention that on the post, but I thought it was funny that many commenters who defended you, did that against those mean Liberals who attacked you. Apparently making a joke with your son is a sure sign of Conservatism, while all critical douches are Liberals. Obviously, none of your Conservative defenders saw this post (hey look, I even left two comments there 16 months ago).

    MommyK, yea, I think at the end it became post-post-post-modern.

    KC, you know, maybe it's like Daddy Geek Boy said, these people have issues. Their comments had more to do with them than they did with the post.

    The man, that's a terrible story... It can be difficult to stop myself from thinking about stuff I know nothing about, but I should be able to keep my uneducated thoughts to myself.

  9. Oh, Doug, my mistake. I actually left you three comments on that post. Well, my last comment wasn't for you, but for the guy who said, "If the democrats win we will have terrorist as guests at the White House."

  10. Wow. Is that kind of feedback needed and/or neccesary? Just because you have the right to comment on the internet does not give you the right to make snap judgements and condemn a complete stranger. What a nut.

  11. Baby Bassinet, I know... But you see it on the internet all the time. And it's like I said, anonymity allows otherwise very introverted people to reach out to others and create friendly virtual communities, or it can turn people into real assholes...



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