Tuesday, August 23, 2011

In Which My Son Asks Me What Just Happened

Planet Earth


"What was that? That was an earthquake. What's an earthquake? Oh... It's when... You know... Like... We live on Planet Earth. I mean, we live in Baltimore, which is a part of Planet Earth. You know that ball you have, with the picture... Remember you asked me what it was, and I said it was Planet Earth? So that's what... So... We live on the surface of Planet Earth, in a place called Baltimore. Yes, in Maryland. Baltimore is in Maryland.

"Now, under the earth... like, under the ground in Baltimore and in Maryland and everywhere, there are plates. Hmmm... No. Forget I said that. There are big rocks under the ground, and sometimes they move because there's an earthquake. No, they move and THEN there's an earthquake when they move and hit each other. Something like that. So now these two rocks hit each other and there was a big BOOM, and it made everything shake all the way from North Carolina to New York or even further, and that's what just happened. Makes sense?

"No? Ask your mom when she comes home then."



I knew that day would come. I was a dreamer in high-school. In physics class, I sat by the window and watched the world. The teacher came over to my chair, and after a few quiet moments of just standing next to me (without me noticing), told the class, "We have a detective here! While we're wasting our time studying physics, he's busy doing his detective work. What are you looking at now, let me see... Oh, this guy walking there... Is he a spy? Are you searching for spies?"

Later that year, in the basement floor physics lab, which was the only air-conditioned room in the school, that same teacher told the class I was wasting the school's air-condition.

I didn't get science, in other words. And since we've made the decision to have kids, I was dreading the day I'd have to teach my kids something about science. As far as I'm concerned, if you fall off a plane, your best bet is to aim for a cloud, so at least it will be a cushy impact.

Considering I have no idea what I'm talking about, I think I actually did a pretty adequate job. And as long as my son never asks me about the way rainbows are made, I think I'm good.
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24 comments:

  1. when the sun shines through rain drops they create a prism which breaks the sunlight into it's natural colors. they are ROY G BIV red, orange, yellow, green, blue, indigo, violet. :) I loved science but Im a complete waste when it comes to spelling. You did a good job on the earthquake thingy.

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  2. That's hilarious! I remember when some kid (I forget his name) asked me how thunder is created. I said someone is playing bowling on high volume. Then, I walked out. I'm clueless, lol.

    Jane

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  3. That's funny! Glad my son was napping through it to avoid that question!

    http://chocolatemomrants.blogspot.com/

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  4. I could almost imagine this scene...

    i guess when i'll be a father and my child will come asking me things like this...i'd just act busy and say "I'm busy sweetie...go ask your mother"

    Anyway you did a great job...

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  5. My kids are way past where I can help them in science class. Or history for that matter. I'm always like, "I didn't even take that class in high school. Why don't you call grandpa and ask him?"

    And UGH on the comments from the teacher. Cassie and I were just talking about how mean some teachers can be for no reason. Well, I mean, they have a reason I'm sure but it has nothing to do with teaching or learning. :-(

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  6. It is sometimes hard to answer children's questions but the more they are curious the more we know they are thinking.

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  7. Jane, one day I'll learn it all. Maybe if I pretend to help him with science homework.

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  8. Chocolate Mom, I was in the kitchen with the kids, and although both of us were confused, he was a tiny bit more confused, which meant it was my job to explain things...

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  9. Los Angeles, thanks. I'm not that sure, though. When his mom came and I asked the boy to tell her what happened, he said there was a BOOM in North Carolina and then he stopped it with his foot. Hey, I did my best.

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  10. Jill, you're a teacher so I'm sure stuff like that bothers you, but I always felt I deserved it. Earned it, even. And it wasn't like I was going to be a great nuclear physicist but his disparaging comments turned me off science, you know? The only thing that made any sense in that class were these jokes.

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  11. Real, and the more answers we have to give, the more we realize how little we really know and how much we can still learn.

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  12. That's the stage when you will answer questions you don't even know the answers yourself. LOL They will ask questions one after another and the you go uhmmm... I don't know. :)

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  13. Soon, it will be the time for your child to ask you about adulthood. :)

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  14. So what does he's mom said when you asked her the questions?

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  15. It will be harder if a little girl would ask you questions because they wouldn't stop until you got nothing more to answer to them.

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  16. I never thought this could have an impact to parenthood. OMG, I almost failed in Science, too. LOL Can I just answer "its when the earth shakes"? Even so, children will always follow it up with another question.

    ~Jam

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  17. Those questions are way better than the questions they will ask you when they grow a bit older.

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  18. That is one of the benefits of being a child, you can ask anything and not be termed as "know-nothing"

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  19. My younger cousin asked me that before when we had an earthquake in my area and we were alone at home. He was 6 and when he asked me that I was like "Okay, if you find out the answer to that by yourself and got it right, I'll treat you to an ice cream!" and he shoot off to the phone, called up his mom and asked her lol!

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  20. Kids are a lot smarter than we think they are. :)

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  21. The harder the questions the more they are thinking. That's a great start! Smart kid!

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  22. This is a tough one. I have people ask "what's wrong?" with my son more often now. One mom had a child Down's who asked me.

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  23. it reminds me of one: a kid was asking his father all day questions, "Dad, why is the sky blue?", "dad, why are the stars shining in the night?, "dad, what is a rainbow?, and the father : don't know", a few minutes later, he asks again: "Dad, that's okay I asks so many questions?". the father said :"my son,if you don't ask how will you know? ".liline

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