It's easy to dismiss some of the advice a new parent gets from his or her parents (and it's even easier when it comes from in-laws). We just say, "That's not how they do things nowadays," which works for a while, at least until the next time they insist the baby sleeps only on his belly and eats watermelon when he's 3-months-old.
But when it comes to contemporary philosophies we tend to get lost (unless we pretend we know what we're doing). There's so much out there, after all.
One of the main issues new parents deal with is where the newborn will sleep. Everyone told us we were making a mistake. It was the same horror story every day: If we don't teach our child to sleep in his crib he'll be coming to our bed every night until he's a teenager. And even then, he'll never be independent.
Dave at Attachment Parenting believes in
extended breast feeding, co-sleeping, non-violence towards children, and carrying or otherwise being with babies (especially newborns) every hour of the day. You can tell us attachment parenting types, actually, by the slings we use to tote our babies. :-)
In the end, we didn't have to make that choice. Our baby lost interest in breast milk around his first birthday, and when--also around that time--he started walking everywhere, including walking on our bed while we were asleep, we knew it was time for him to go downstairs. Crying because he was lonely for a minute seemed less painful than for him to walk off the bed and fall straight on his head.
Dave talks about the life of a single parent, about maintaining the anonymity of his children, and about anything else fathers talk about. And he even answers readers questions. A good place to go if you find yourself thinking about the line between allowing your child to be independent on the one hand and letting the child know you're always there for him on the other. It's all a give-and-take, I suppose.
2 comments:
Thanks for the kind words about my blog! :-)
You're welcome. And thank you.
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